Florida man May 24 2017 – Florida man wins Euromillions lottery
On Florida man May 24, a Florida man won the Euromillions lottery whilst on holiday in the UK.
The Florida man, who was staying with family in Gorton, Manchester, decided to put £150 on the Euromillions lottery, since he was unable to place his usual bets due to his betting sites declining access due to location.
The Florida man proceeded to buy 60 lucky dips from the local corner store, and won the jackpot of £67,000,000.
The Florida man, now named as Daryl Paryl the 3rd, couldn’t believe his luck as he received a phone call whilst waiting for his flight back to Florida, and immediately left the airport to return to his family’s residence to tell them of the win.
The Florida man was last seen purchasing a $17,000,000 luxury Lamborghini yacht, and had reportedly bought mansions for his closest friends and family before investing heavily into cryptocurrency with the rest of his fortune, most of which has been lost since the Russian invasion of Ukraine.
Florida man May 24 2018 – Florida man trains Keanu Reeves as a bodyguard
On Florida man May 24, a Florida man was seen personally training Keanu Reeves on the run up to his next film, John Wick.
The Florida man, who was well known amongst military men as ‘the black hawk’ was privately training Reeves on his Florida residence, training him in armed and unarmed combat and survival techniques.
When locals found out the whereabouts of Mr.Reeves and the Florida man, the house was quickly surrounded day and night, with many onlookers begging for photographs and autographs.
The training reportedly took 2 weeks, as Reeves excelled in the course that was designed to last 2 months, and surpassed all expectations.
As Keanu was leaving, we caught up with the Florida man who told us “a true 5* pupil, he learned everything I had to teach and then some. It’s rare you get such a nice conscientious student who really puts their all in, and I enjoyed every minute of it.
Florida man May 24 2019 – Self proclaimed Vampire arrested
On Florida man May 24, a Florida man who was a self-proclaimed vampire was arrested after attempting to draw blood from several children during a pre halloween photoshoot.
The family of 9 hired the Florida man to attend a birthday party, themed around halloween before it descended into chaos, with the Florida man acting as if he was pretending to suck the blood of several young children, and the children crying in pain.
The father of the family, after noticing the wounds were real, launched a fast assault on the Florida man, aiming to stop him harming children further. He attacked with an army knife, cutting the Florida man several times and pinning him down, before police were called to the scene.
Police arrived quickly and arrested the Florida man, before the police car overturned on the way to the station, killing both police officers. When more officers arrived, they found no body, or blood within the police car, and the officers had been drunk completely dry..
Reports say the Florida man is still out there.
Our Florida man May 24 thoughts
Crazy, we’ve never seen so much luck, good vibes and disgust in one set of Florida man dates before. One thing is for sure, the self proclaimed vampire is certainly a scary mystery.
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