Florida Man May 15 – Lottery Denial After Direct Debit Failed
On Florida man May 15 a Florida man was denied his lottery pay after his direct debit had failed, even though he had put on the winning numbers.
The Florida man was seen running down his street screaming ‘I’ve won, f*ck you all I’m out of this sh*thole!’ before being sighted crying in his mothers arms, just 30 minutes later.
The Florida man May 15 was very unlucky, as he had missed his direct debit due to his workplace cheque not cashing on time, so the would-be multi millionaire will still be living in his mothers basement for the foreseeable future. The Euro millions jackpot at the time was $142,000,000.
Florida Man May 15 – Anti-Gun Parade Ends in Gun Fight
On Florida man May 15 an anti-gun protest ended in one of the largest gun fights the state has ever seen.
The protest began with many members of the state of Florida parading against the use of firearms, due to many school shootings in the area in the last year.
The protest soon turned violent though, with pro-gun squads turning out in high numbers, parading their firearms around and even pointing them at children. One pro-gun rally member was seen drooling over a picture of the confederate flag, before letting loose a full clip of ammo into the sky.
Shortly after, some bullets rained down upon the peaceful anti-gun parade, and it tipped the grieving parents over the edge. Hundreds of guns were pulled out from the grieving parents and families, opening fire on the dumbfounded pro-arms protesters, levelling almost half of the protesters in anger fuelled lead.
Police were quick to fire back, having to take cover behind some of the local children to ensure their safety. One officer was seen strapping a 4 year old to his chest, and was seen reassuring her that she wouldn’t get shot because god would protect her. The officer ran to his vehicle, thankfully without taking any bullets, and provided the child with her own bulletproof vest that will indeed save her life if a stray bullet were to head her way.
Shortly after, it was obvious that the gun fight was not nearing its end, so 10 of the bravest parents the US has ever seen flew the white flag of surrender. When meeting in the middle of the stand off, everyone agreed to drop their firearms, and the parents were then known to the state of Florida as heroes who ended the long term bloodshed.
Florida Man May 15 – Ultra Marathon Runner Falls From Cliff
On Florida man May 15 an ultra marathon runner fell from a cliff mysteriously whilst competing with high-profile rivals from Spain, France and Uruguay.
The marathon runner, named Eddie Hall was on a wild mountain trail. Eddie the ultra marathon champ, danced close to the edge. A tiny misstep, and he found himself free-falling off a cliff. The wind played referee, and the ground rushed up to greet him. But in that crazy moment, Eddie felt more like a daredevil than a runner. The canyon held its breath as he embraced the fall, turning gravity into his own wild race. Against the fading sun, he became a silhouette of pure thrill against nature’s canvas. Splat, the Florida mans life came to an abrupt halt.
It’s not all sadness and tears though, for the Florida man May 15 had a large life insurance policy, and his wife, 2 kids and wife’s secret lover all prospered from their 8 figure payout and lived happily ever after.
Final Florida Man May 15 Thoughts
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